Dating Dangerous Liaisons

Image Credit: cottonbro studio

While I am not a fan of dating or finding a date through an app, I try not to judge those who do. But every day I see evidence of the danger presented when the heart overrules the head. Dating apps have been gaining momentum from extortion through fake profiles and photos, to death and criminality.

Sometimes, people think this only occurs with the young and naïve believing in a state of alleged reality that those individuals masquerading as the real person depicted in the photos on these apps are tried and true. But we also find that people over 50, 60, and 70 are being spammed, scammed, and flimflammed. Victim exploitation occurs when prime candidates want to get back out on the dating scene, but are oversharing information about their loneliness, that they are a widow or widower, they are isolated and lonely, or these scammers detect obvious neediness. Bingo! They check into your life and don’t check out, at least not that easy anyway, and without repercussions.

Often I wonder how these people can live with themselves, taking things so far and threatening their victims because their victims have unknowingly fed them all they need to know to take advantage of and manipulate them to financial ruin, criminal prosecution, winding up on a missing persons report, or even death. I’ve known of a few people who are considered smart, with educational achievements, and appear to have good common sense who vow to the validity of some of these dating apps, only to come out on the losing end of the deal because they were played like a monopoly game, resulting in no love and no satisfaction.

While there are some success stories with these dating apps, you must be careful about who you let into your life and personal space when they knock. I’m sure that the developers of these dating apps designed their objective to connect like-minded people looking for love or companionship. But as always, when something has been developed for good, like social media in general, we find that shady characters look for ways to manipulate a person’s trust and see where such individuals are desperate by offering too much or all of themselves before realizing they are in too deep.

If you are using one or more of these apps, please exercise caution, because these exploiters are seasoned by what they do. They could care less about your hurt feelings or pride, they just care about how much they can extort from you.

Image Credit: Pixabay

55 thoughts on “Dating Dangerous Liaisons”

  2. Oh Sadje, I was listening to some horror stories over the weekend, and while I wrote this piece before then, this is more problematic yet preventable. I had a ton of spammers send me dating links through WordPress a couple of years ago. It was exhausting trying to find my real connections amid that mess but thank goodness after finally and repeatedly permanently deleting them, I only see them occasionally. It’s crazy girlfriend. I don’t know how people can fall in love or in lust so easily, sight unseen. 😲🤔😱 Talk about dangerous. Thanks Sadje! 🙏🏼

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  4. Very timely post. I love this line “spammed, scammed, and flimflammed.” Well done, Miz Kym. I think that line would make a a good poem:

    Please beware the Flimflam Man, who tries to con whatever he can, whether online or in the White House, the Flimflam Man is really a louse.

    Referring to TFG.

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  5. I agree with you, meeting people on the internet can be dangerous because everyone could pass themselves off as someone they are not.
    I am single, divorced, and I have met some wonderful people online, with one of whom I had a serious relationship until his death, at the time of Covid.
    Another is a doctor to whom I have also sent some of my friends for consultations, or a television journalist who was a little too narcissistic, a very kind lawyer or an interesting painter. This was a while ago, before things on the internet degenerated, and through sites to which one only had paid access

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  6. The thought of dating in our present time worries me, let alone dating through an app. That’s just downright scary to me. I started praying for my children’s future spouses when they were just little kids. So far, they’ve done pretty good, and I am thankful. xo

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  9. With all these new technologies we should always remain on the safe side Kym. Good to talk about it as it can ruin so many lives. There is danger everywhere for sure but even more in this kind if set up as we never know who is on the other side of the screen.
    Thank you for sharing on this topic

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  10. Now honey Chile I best hope you’re not a fan “dating or finding a date through an app” … why your hubby would have your head lol. Some pretty scary stuff out there for sure and an employee I had meant someone on FB she “loved” oh it got scary when they went to tie the know.. she’d even moved in with him. And then there are some that are a match made in heaven💓

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  11. Oh I agree with you Sadje. I have known a few women who went this route and these were highly educated and sensible people, but they got scammed because they believed the great lie! So sad and tragic! 😥

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  13. Oh wow Luisa, you know we meet so many people and we think they are decent like us online or not. Some are, and many aren’t. But you made a very important point, that this occurred before things on the internet began to degenerate. That’s the difference! Thanks so much for sharing your experiences my friend. Much love my dear! 🥰💖😘

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  14. Oh wow Kymber, what a touching show of concern from a wonderful mother. 👩‍👦‍👦 This is a scary time and I truly understand exactly what you mean when you express how worried we can get about the people our young people meet. So we pray they will have a discerning spirit and listen to their hearts. If they get that “gut-feeling” it is a real thing. Gotta pay attention to that. Thanks so much my KymberNoodle. 🥰💖😍💞🤗

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  15. There you go Wynne. I agree. Sometimes we meet people out and about, and you just never know who you may invite into your life, not just a love interest. We just try to be as careful as we can, because these jokers can strike anywhere, at anytime. Thanks for chiming in girlfriend. 🥰🙏🏼😊

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  16. Oh my goodness Maggie, I am so sad that you had to go through that. 😢 You know, you can’t beat yourself up over it (which I know you are not) because these butt-holes know how to try and take advantage of people when they know they are at a vulnerable and fragile point in their life. We want companionship, because we don’t want to live the life of a hermit. But once we see things and people for what they are, we can’t ignore those warning signs going forward. Stay positive and encouraged my friend. 😊💖🥰💞🥂 Thanks so much for sharing your story my friend. 🙏🏼

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  17. Thank you Kym 🥰💕
    Yes, I think they can smell vulnerability a mile away.
    I was at a very low ebb at that time.
    Now they would need to get up real early to stand a chance 😅.
    The thing is ..it is so widespread 😡.
    Most people do blame themselves , so don’t talk about it 😪.
    Thank you for another great post my friend 🤗🌹❣️
    I am in a far better place now 🙏🙏

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  18. Girl Marie, you nailed it. 👍🏼 Once upon a time, when social media seemed to be a safe haven that was so enjoyable, there is always a crook cooking something up that smells foul. 😡 We’ve had quite a few young women who have gone missing in our area, and when authorities check their digital footprint, they find that their disappearance leads to tragic endings and the suspects are scary. Many are found dead hundreds of miles away from their homes. I don’t understand how people can be so downright evil. 👿 Thanks so much for chiming in my friend. Stay safe out there! 🤗

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  19. Guuurrrlllll Cindy, thank goodness neither one of us has to worry about these online dating situations right now. I’ve seen and heard too many horror stories (but there are a few success stories). These predators know how to woo people when they are at a vulnerable point in their life. Sometimes we can be just a little too generous with our personal information. 😲😫😯 Hugs and smooches ladybug! 🥰💖😘

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  21. Thanks for raising this issue, Kym. These online romance scams have become a real problem, resulting in financial losses in millions of dollars here in the USA. Some even end in extortion and death. Those of us who are not on a dating app are not exempt from being targeted. I’ve already been wooed on Facebook and am cautious with new followers on WordPress.

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  25. Oh Maggie, I can definitely tell you are a warrior now and not a worrier. Victims usually blame themselves, but the good think is, if you live through it all, it’s going to be alright! You usually arrive at a far better place after you’ve been through the ringer. So happy for you my friend. 😊💪🏼🥂

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  27. Oh girl Rosaliene, I mentioned to someone earlier that I had some solicitations on WordPress already and it was worse a year or so ago. It’s so infuriating, but I just hit my permanently delete button after hitting my spam button, and I “let it go” like Elsa sang in Frozen. 😱 I stopped asking if these individuals have a real job and they do…to build their wealth through scamming you out of your hard earned money! 😡

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  29. Oh my goodness Ginger, it’s such a shame that something that was meant for good turned sinister, because some folks turned these platforms into breeding grounds. 😠 As they say, karma is a bitch and she bites back real hard! 😜

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  36. so many are desperate for that connection, and will grasp at anything….I’m old because I just understand the attraction of using apps…..but, I also enough to remember the days of companionship ads in some newspapers……

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  38. There’s “buyer. beware!” and now there’s “dating app-er, beware!” Not trying to be funny, because this is a serious issue but being online isn’t the same as face to face and caution is needed. So glad you are raising awareness about this for folks of all ages and circumstances.

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  39. Wow! Awesome advise my dear friend Kym, thank’s for help us to open eyes more,
    because it´s important to be careful. Have a wonderful, relaxing and cozy evening!
    Abrazote mi amiga! Cheers! Sleep well!

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  42. Some of these romance scams originate in countries like Nigeria. Scammers steal photos and profiles from other people and masquerade as those people. Some red flags: claiming to be a doctor working with a humanitarian aid organization, claiming to be widowed or divorced, claiming to be stuck somewhere and needing money to get home, and not taking no for an answer. The scammer tries to get psychological control over the victim so the victim will do their bidding. The best thing to do is to block these people from social media and be wary on dating apps. I personally will never use a dating app or the Internet to find a partner. If I can’t meet someone in person, I will take a pass. Even meeting someone in person is a risk because scammers can be extremely charming and convincing. Also, the online scammers can be women masquerading as men. It’s all about money.

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  43. Yeah Warren I concur. And at some point, good common sense has to kick in when your gut is speaking to you. There are things the spirit speaks to us that we need to pay attention to and listen. Thanks for chiming in my friend. 😘💖😊

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  45. Oh my goodness Dora, yes to face-to-face. Even then you have to be on guard. That’s sad for people wanting to date these days, but it’s so scary too. Like you noted, “Buyer Beware!” 😲😫😱

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  48. Girl Dawn, that’s a slam-dunk about psychological control over the victim. Spot on with your message. Nowadays, an ounce of caution is better than a lifetime of pain. All I have to say is, the gut doesn’t lie, because people are always plotting, and 9.99 times out of 10, it ain’t good! Thanks girlfriend. 😊🙏🏼🥰

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  49. Exactly my dear friend Kym you are right. Thank’s for share and being always so kind. Keep well too.
    Have a lovely and relaxing evening as well! Buenas noches! Abrazote mi amiga! 🙏🤗🌟✨🌛💤

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  54. I am skeptical about online dating sites too, Kym, but when my hubby and I met, they didn’t exist. Young adults are growing up in a different time. And as much as I’d probably steer clear, I do know of two positive outcomes. So, you’re right, the bottom line is to be careful. Great post, my friend! xoxoxoxo

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  55. Thanks a million Lauren my friend. Yes, we are living in a different time. Even face-to-face dating isn’t a surefire bet. You have to be vigilant either way. I am not a fan though of online dating and don’t think I am open to try it. I am happy for those who have found happiness though. To each his own. Have a safe and FANtabulous week sweetie pie. Cheers! 😍🥂😘

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